Usually a place you’d probably prefer to avoid, abandoned penitentiaries are becoming some of the more desired spots to spend a holiday. You don’t have to upset the law to be thrown into these slammers, just a sense of humour, an open mind and your holiday parole money.
The Liberty Hotel, Boston, USA
The old Charles Street Jail is something of a Boston legend. Opened in 1851, the 220-cell penitentiary has played host to several celebrity convicts, including Albert DeSalvo, aka the Boston Strangler; Malcolm X; and the crew of a German submarine during World War II. The jail was then officially closed in 1990 due to mass overcrowding.
Today, the grounds have been overhauled into one of the swankiest hotels in Massachusetts, featuring a huge cell block-cum-extravagant lobby, fine dining restaurants and 298 surprisingly roomy bedroom suites.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at The Liberty Hotel.
Malmaison, Oxford, UK
At nearly 1,000 years old, the sight of Oxford‘s Malmaison hotel is steeped in a rich local history. Originally an 11th century wooden motte and bailey castle, the grounds were raided by the Normans in the Anarchy war, only to be built and battered during the English Civil War. The remaining patchwork structure was converted into a high security prison in the 1800s.
After closure in 1996, the grounds were transformed into a Grade I heritage landmark, a shopping centre and a popular boutique hotel. The Malmaison has a variety of luxuries that visiting detainees can enjoy, including jail cells featuring 6-inch wide windows and the rental of chic black-and-white prison apparel. You might even get the chance to meet Mary Blandy, a former inmate from the 18th century whose ghost lingers in the grounds at night… The hotel is also a popular wedding venue.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at the Malmaison.
Långholmen Hotel, Stockholm, Sweden
Prisoners couldn’t hatch their Great Escape, but – when you look at the arresting surroundings of Stockholm‘s Långholmen island – why would you ever want to leave? This little islet once played host to Sweden’s biggest prison, featuring 500-cells and glorious green courtyards, before closing in 1989.
The grounds were remodelled into a very attractive holiday getaway in 1991, boasting not only an exclusive hotel, but a buzzing youth hostel too. Whether you’re an old inmate or a thrifty juvie, the guided island tours and sunny atrium lounge are the perfect way to luxuriate during your sentence.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at the Långholmen Hotel.
Four Seasons, Istanbul, Turkey
If you’re looking to get incarcerated somewhere on the Balkan Peninsula this summer, you could do a lot worse than live behind bars at the Four Seasons Hotel Istanbul at Sultanahmet. Tucked away in the Old City of Istanbul oldest district, this beautiful hotel was formerly the site for the first jail house in the Ottoman Empire capital, but is perhaps most famous for being depicted in the 1978 movie thriller Midnight Express.
Featuring fantastic neoclassical architecture – and within walking distance to Istanbul’s Topkapi Palace and Blue Mosque – the abandoned prison site was quickly snapped up by the Four Seasons hotelier and opened as a luxury hotel and spa resort in 1996.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at the Four Seasons Hotel Istanbul at Sultanahmet.
Karosta Prison, Liepāja, Latvia
If you really want to know what it feels like to live behind bars, then why not lock yourself in at Latvia‘s Karosta Prison? A former military detention centre first controlled by the Tsarist Autocracy and later for the KGB, it was reopened as a role-playing museum in the late nineties and has since become the must-see attraction of Liepāja.
For a measly £10, you’ll be treated to a one night’s stay, complete with your own iron bed, a prison meal and all-night harassment from the no-nonsense prison guards. Visiting with young children? Not a problem! The Karosta Prison offers discounted rates for young troublemakers, plus educational talks on how to be an upstanding member of society. Breakfast not included, but there is free parking.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at the Karosta Prison.
The Het Arresthuis in Roermond, the Netherlands
For most of our prison hotel selections, the penitential history seems like a faraway fairy tale. For the Het Arresthuis Hotel in Roermond, the Netherlands, however, the switch from dangerous lock-up in 2007, to the glamorous voluntary resort in 2013 is so fresh that you might still hear the screams of former inmates echoing in the corridors. Hopefully not though.
The 150-cells have been transformed into 38 sizeable living quarters, including four suites named The Jailer, The Lawyer, The Director and The Judge. Every room is kitted out with cutting edge Dutch design mixed in with the original 1863 penal features, including the prison doors, which you can now even lock from the inside!
Beyond the living grounds, there’s the “Penitentiary Dinners”, where porridge slop is swapped for tasty gastro cuisine and served on one communal dining table. Don’t worry though, if you’re still craving a bit more authenticity, the wardens will gladly show you video slides chronicling the hotel’s notorious history.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at the Het Arresthuis Hotel.
The Old Mount Gambier Gaol, Mount Gambier, Australia
On the less lavish end of the prison accommodation spectrum is The Old Mount Gambier Gaol on Australia‘s sunny Limestone Coast. Closed as a prison in 1994, the derelict grounds were snapped up by a family and adapted into an affordable backpacker’s hostel in 2010.
Featuring gun turrets, a wall mural made by former inmates and a stone’s throw away from the regions famous Blue Lake, the hostel offers cell-block accommodation at competitive rates. Unlike those criminals, however, you’ll even get your own dorm room key so that you can come and go as you please.
Go straight to jail: book a cell at The Old Mount Gambier Gaol.